The Life and Times of a Neurotic Dog

Our oldest dog, Bo, has already been introduced to everybody. Let's take another look.

He is quite regal looking. I like to think that if he was human, he would be a prince. Or the Rock.

Mmmmmmm... oh, excuse me.

Anyway, he was a veritable train wreck when we got him. He was malnourished, underweight, had sores on his neck from a choke chain, etc, etc. We just went to go "look", which is how we ended up with all our other dogs. Apparently, you never go look.

So we ended up with our first dog. He hated people for a while, then fell in love with G.I. Joe. I had a bit of crisis that I was unloved, but we have resolved our differences. But now that I think about it, who wouldn't love this face?

I am such a bad person for making this picture public.

The other parent is not much better.

Lordy. We should be sterilized.

I'm proud to say that we started out raising our dogs with the best of intentions. I'm also proud to say that we're not abusive or neglectful. I once cried when we got stuck in traffic and the dogs missed their normal dinner time.

This is just a documentation of Bo's deterioration into insanity. The sad part is that he is only two and has begun to turn into that crazy old man.

We got Bo at about eight months old, and bombarded him with shots, medicine, and food. I spent roughly four months of his life cooking special food, because he refused to eat. You don't know love until you lay on the floor for an hour pretending to enjoy dog food to make your dog eat it\


He eventually got healthy, and we started working on the fact that he didn't have strong enough muscles to jump into a Honda. We decided to take him camping, where G.I. Joe decided to teach him to swim.

He wasn't crazy about it. So G.I. Joe took him cliff-diving.

Before you gasp in horror and call the ASPCA on us, let me just tell you that Bo now loves water almost as much as he loves bacon. Almost.

He became our baby, and was a spoiled little brat.

Seriously.

Then G.I. Joe left for his Army stuff, and things went downhill for Bo.

He got neutered.

I have personally never been neutered, but I imagine it's not much fun.

Things eventually got better.

G.I. came back from Army stuff, he and the Den Mother got married, and moved to a far away place. It rained a lot, but there were many trees. Things sort of evened out.

But eventually Bo got lonely. He had never been without an additional dog companion, even at his most socially awkward. So we got this.

Awfully innocent face for a demon, if you ask me.
So besides getting yelled at more often for playing too rough, Bo was quite happy with this new addition. She even got bigger, and it was good. For Bo.

They get along great, which is terrible for us.

We also inherited some baby ducks along the way.

Eventually they grew up, quacked a lot, and were put in a pond. Bathtubs are only so big.

So things were ok for a little while. There was food, attention, and space to nap.

Then Bo started walking funny, and couldn't go for long walks. He has hip dysplasia. In fact, he has no hip joints; his hips are supported entirely by muscles on his thighs. I had a breakdown, and G.I. Joe was the sane one. I started wondering if they made doggie wheelchairs large enough for him.

Thankfully, Bo learned how to swim. And it was good.

Until...

Uh oh.

This little guy was a handful at 7 weeks old. Literally. And Bo didn't like him, because he was cute and tiny and fragile, and he would get in trouble everytime he tried to put Barrett's head in his mouth.

Now Barrett is bigger, and things are slightly better. But poor Bo- he went from being an only child who was doted on constantly, to the one who always gets in trouble. HE has to set a good example. HE is the big boy now, and you can bet your booty he doesn't like it.

Maybe it's time to get a kitten.